The Two-Minute Haggadah

Last night Chris & I went to the pre-Passover Seder celebration of a friend, which she called "Passover Lite." Even though we didn't read from this fabulous Two-Minute Haggadah, I wanted to share it with all y'all - especially the gentiles among you - as it's not only a speedy way to understand the whole Passover thing, it's also freaking hysterical. Here's just an excerpt:

Four questions:
1. What's up with the matzoh?
2. What's the deal with horseradish?
3. What's with the dipping of the herbs?
4. What's this whole slouching at the table business?

Answers:
1. When we left Egypt, we were in a hurry. There was no time for making decent bread.
2. Life was bitter, like horseradish.
3. It's called symbolism.
4. Free people get to slouch.

But really, you should read the whole thing. I mean, it'll take you all of two minutes (barring several minutes set aside for convulsive laughter, that is), so surely you can spare the time.

Happy Pesach to all, and to all a Good Night.